My legs felt weak but I managed to get back up the hallway and out the front door. I got home and mum said I was just in time for lunch. “What’s wrong dear?” she asked “you look flushed”. Flushed indeed. I gulped down my lunch and went to my bedroom. I lay on the bed thinking about what I saw while I masturbated. I did it quite often but this time my orgasm seemed twice as strong.Having calmed down I wondered how I could go to work on Monday, knowing what I knew. I ummed and aahed all weekend but decided I should go back. So on Monday I arrived at the normal time. All seemed normal but that image was stuck there. Mr Walden said hello and said it was time to leave. Mrs Walden said “you go ahead love. I want to talk to Fiona”. He left and she told me to sit in the lounge. I was worried about what she wanted me for. I was sure they hadn’t seen me Saturday.She sat opposite me. “Fiona we know you were still in the house Saturday and we know what you saw” she said. It was no use lying.. His curly hair in my shoulder, biting my breast. I don’t even remember most of it, just having a throat too sore to protest when my best friend would pull me from the mattress on the floor. She’d help me on with my pants and cardigan, shove me into her car, and never say a word. Her shame was equal to mine, and we kept each other’s secrets. Such friendship is so rare, it may as well be considered impossible to find. But naturally even she disappeared from my life just as easily as the rest, especially when the love of my life told me he fantasized about her. I could never see her the same way as before, after picturing him entering her, even if it was his sick daydream. Sometimes I pick up the box, the one we all have somewhere hidden in our homes or garages or storage units. The one with the dried flowers, cards, letters, mixed tapes, stuffed animals, dirty photos, anything he or she might have left behind. I have letters that I read. Text and email transcripts. Some horrible.
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